These are original one-liners that I think I’ve coined. I just thought of writing them down because I’ve been victimized by plagiarists enough. I can only hope that these one-liners eventually become part of pop culture. In any case, at least I have first dibs on them.
1. “I’d rather live for five minutes than die for 50 years.”
This is what I say to myself and to my friends when we
get scared about doing some life-changing things.
2. “I admire him the way a vegetarian admires a fine cut of meat
so I won’t eat him.”
This is what I say when I explain that I can admire a
guy’s looks but not desire him.
3. “My regret runneth over.”
I recently coined this phrase out of frustration.
4. “There are 100 types idiots and they can all be found in this
building.”
This one’s self-explanatory.
5. “Cuddle-cuddle.”
I say this when a sugar high generates fake feel-good
vibes.
6. “I’ve been Ruffles-ing the whole day.”
This is what I say to refer to a junk food binge.
7. “They have cut-and-paste conversations.”
This is what I say to refer to people who have
conversations featuring the exact same topics and the exact
same exchanges day after day. Worse, their topics and
exchanges are just like everyone else’s!
8. “Don’t be in a template relationship.”
This is what I say to people who are tempted to just
latch on to anyone because everyone expects them to be with
a person who looks good on paper.
9. “Companies already assume that you’re full of shit, but they
require you to submit a stool sample for your medical exam
because they want to know what kind of shit you’re made of.”
Hahaha!
10. “God is not a micro-manager so he doesn’t have time to
attend to all your troubles.”
This is what I say to those who whine for no
reason.
6 responses so far ↓
sandra // June 8, 2007 at 9:56 am |
hi faye! followed the link trail from blagador to fairlycloudy to you. methinks boss exie will get in touch with you soon about something writerly bec he asked for your phone number.
i miss how you laugh at my students’ photos. let’s do that again soon. but you’ll be laughing at some smug areneow brats instead of harassed-looking UP kids. heh.
Faye Ilogon // June 8, 2007 at 10:11 am |
Saaaaaaaaaaandriiiiiiiiiiiitaaaaaaaaaaa!
Don’t worry, I’ll get to laugh at those pictures very very soon. Ask Butch why. Nyarf.
Frances // June 11, 2007 at 8:27 am |
Hilarious! As only Faye can be. Must see you soon, my dear friend!
Eric Santillan // June 14, 2007 at 4:54 am |
hi faye,
hmmm. i don’t know if you remember me. i was the classmate of shane from way way way way way back.
great reading the stuff you write in here. will try to pepper my conversations with your one-liners. you get first dibs of course.
Faye Ilogon // June 14, 2007 at 5:05 am |
Eric!!! How could I forget you? You’re the mestizo high school valedictorian of my brother’s class!!!
I also remember you as a quiet little boy in shorts and you were running around in Sacred Heart! Hehehe.
Thanks for reading! Wow, you’re a cool blast from the past!
Er, please don’t lose respect for me or what. The dirt is mostly figurative in nature. Nyahahaha.
timelessboulevard // June 23, 2007 at 3:58 am |
Go Number 8!!!!!!
ps: go number 10!!!!